Hash Trash Run 789, DiErections on Run 790

We met in Ramat Hachayal. Some hashers were rather late (you know who you are) and others got antsy ('4 o'clock is 4 o'clock!!!'). Fart Smella gave us a description of various hash ratings and we decided that the HHHH was probably not PG rated. We checked it out.  Captain Caveman found the trail and blasted his horn.  Twin Peaks had another malfunction with her sense of direction and ran in the exact opposite direction from the source of noise. There weren't many runners but lots of holds and false trails so there were so no opportunities to be lazy. Fart Smella was offended by the previous week's lack of a half-way song (EDITORS NOTE: which is odd, SINCE HE WASN'T THERE!) so invented two half-ways this week to make up for lost singing. We continued running through the streets and then into the fields baking under the Israeli summer sun. Semen whinged like a broken record ('It's prom night people! Keep it moving!). We found the beer and circled up. Semen impatiently jingled her keys for maximum effect and fled the scene as soon as she was dismissed. (EDITORS NOTE TWO: Why the hell is a 50 year old woman concerned about the prom? <Insert cradle robbing joke here>)   Hares: Fart Smella, Crock Sucker FRB: Semen DFL: Rocket Returnees: Twin Peaks, Goldmember, Deliverance, Rocket No Hash Kit: Merav Late Cummer: Diablo 200 runs: Twin Peaks 25 Runs: Rocket Sensory Organs Malfunction: Twin Peaks Whining Bastards: Semen, Goldmember, Merav Junior Hash Horn: Squidgy Directions to Run 790 with "Optional" On On Afterward (seriously, is there a mandatory On On?!) From Tel Aviv or north: leave highway no. 2 at Kfar Shmaryahu exit, go east on Ha-Ma'apilim, turn left at 2nd traffic light onto Ha-Zorea, next right, next left onto Ha-Sadot, turn right onto Ha-Rakafot, next left, next right onto Regavim, on your right you will see the parking area. From Ra'anana and Kfar Saba: Take Menakhem Begin from Ra'anana towards Herzliya Pituach, turn right after railroad crossing onto Ha-Sadot, go 1 km, turn right onto Ha-Rakafot, next left, next right onto Regavim, on your right you will see the parking area. Timeline of Events, Courtesy of Quickie, Your Hare 16:00 Circle up for Hash Run No. 790 18:00 Swimming Pool/Barbecue          (please bring towels & meat & salads & beverages,          you may drop food at Ha-Rakafot no. 5 before run) 20:00 Reggae Night 21:30 Music from Down Under 22:00 Latin Night The Scribe's brain is so overloaded with possible jokes about merely having a timeline, coupled with the possibility of Quickie wearing one of those beret/dreadlock wigs and/or there being a didgeridoo orchestra, that she cannot formulate an appropriate response. HARE ROSTER: Goldmember                  6/6/09 Ragip                              6/13/09 Shaila                              6/20/09 Etti                                   6/27/09 Amboho                           7/4/09 On-on! Hash Scribe www.holylandhhh.blogspot.com