Hash Trash New Years edition, Directions to Run 825
New Years Run:
The pack was small and took more wrong turns than right ones, including four laps in front of the Egyptian Ambassador's residence, which was not sketchy at all. Border Bitch, Desperate Housewife and HashHound Riley were attacked by a scruffy little terrier that wouldn't take no for an answer, but did finally take DH's shoe for one. Quickie disappeared at one of the holds, only to emerge a few blocks later with a Jerusalem Post under his arm. His defense? He's home alone with no wife and kiddies. Usually men buy things hidden behind the counter when in that situation, but our Quickie prefers wasting his money on the JPost. The finish of the run was, as usual, into the sea. Everyone got out there, hash brats, hashers, hash hounds… At the final circle the down down table collapsed, bursting the last San Miguel beer onto the ground. It was very, very sad.
Hare: Captain Caveman
FIW (First in Water): Fluffer
LIW: Twin Peaks
Dog Abuse: Desperate Housewife
Shopping: Quickie
Sock Twins: BB, TP
Team Terry Cloth: DH, Fluffer (his was even monogrammed!), Border Bitch, R2D2, C3P0, Twin Peaks
75 Runs: Desperate Housewife
Saturday Run:
We met out in god only knows where for some seriously shaggy hashing. The trail was filled with muddy embankments, prickly bushes and trees… and that was just to get to somewhere quiet to pee before and after the run! Aside from that, the hashers ran off into the hills, hopefully within the Green Line, trying not to fall down and helping Twin Peaks keep her mind of the gigantic swinging thing between her legs. I mean, it was all she could think about! She couldn't stop touching it and adjusting it… and by it, I mean the Hash Cash. At one point, the pack caught Quickie using his GPS (What the WHAT?!) to figure out where the hell we were. Didn't matter, he was still last.
Hares: CrockSucker, Fart Smella
FRB: Desperate Housewife
DFL: Quickie
Uni-ball: Twin Peaks
Wee, Wee, Wee, All the way home: Desperate Housewife, Border Bitch, Long Horny
GadgetGeek: Quickie
Late Cummers: Twin Peaks, Caveman, Quickie
Returnees: Long Horny, Fart Smella
Misnaming: CrockSucker (and Border Bitch, but she continues to dispute it. If a hasher misnames in the forest…)
New Shoes: Long Horny, who admitted as much during the run and then attempted to backtrack later.
Matchy Matchy: Twin Peaks, Quickie
Milestones: Quickie, Captain Caveman
Directions to Run 825
The run will start and end at Chez Housewife-Bitch, 16 Levi Eshkol Kohav Hatsafon. It is one block south of Shay Agnon on Levi Eshkol, near Sde Dov and Seminar HaKibutzim. For you google map lovers, click here
There will be an On-On afterward - bring things to eat and things to eat with! Although Desperate Housewife and Border Bitch are as hospitable as ever, they are living out of boxes. So we will need everything from plastic cups and silverware to meat and salads.
Lost? Call Fluffer 052-880-1111
Hare Roster - Let me know when you want to set!
16-Jan Goldmember
23-Jan Fart Smella
30-Jan Porn Queen
6-Feb ???????????
20-Feb AmboHo
27-Feb Semen
6-Mar BlingDong
posted by Hash Scribe at 8:13 PM
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